Things 2 Ponder..

Have u ever stayed up late 2 watch a movie or chat on msn. Although u r very tired & eyes about 2 close, u'll force urself awake juz 2 see e outcome of e show. Or juz bcoz u r enjoying e conversation, ur eyes r juz glued 2 ur computer screen in expectation of wat e other party had 2 say.

Since my exams ended mid June , I've been indulging myself in wat I've always wanted 2 do. Serving in ministry overtime most nites & playing video games into e wee hours of e morning while chatting on-line. Somehow when u r doing wat u love, u juz can't seem 2 leave it. even w ppl it's like that, when u enjoy e person's presence, u'll juz wanna spend all ur time w e person. More than juz indulging, it has become an addiction which I juz realized today. When u do not know when 2 stop & take a breather, wat u enjoy can become a horrible nightmare as it begins 2 take over ur life. Serving becomes a means of false security & control, gaming becomes ur world than a form of relaxation, e person u enjoy company turns into lust! Wow.. Sounds serious isn't it. It actually is!! & many times we r so into it w such passion tat we do not realise a good has become a bad!

It is juz amazing how we can bury ourselves in so much, force ourselves awake @ nite & when @ e end of it all, we say we r too tired 2 talk 2 Jesus. Didn't wanna pray juz now, but e HS drew me into His presence. It's been like that e past few nites. Most of e time I'd say, "sorry Jesus, I'm too tired mentally, physically & emotionally, can i do it tomorrow?" But as we know tomorrow never comes. I thank God 4 His mercies, 4 calling 2 me inspite of my laziness, & I realize as I spend time w Him, e tiredness will go away. Pressing into His presence takes time & effort, but it's all worth while when u get a touch from Him.

If only we can be addicted 2 Jesus & His presence all the time instead of all that I've mentioned above! But God doesn't want that as well. If not we become 2 flaky & irrelevent 2 e world we live in today. But God does want us 2 spend time w Him, He enjoys our presence & conversation as much as we enjoy His, He wants 2 be e centre balancing force of our lives! It 's like a game I used 2 play as a kid called "topple". The idea of e game is 2 unbalance a circular scale in such a manner that when e next player has his turn, he topples e whole balance! We r that balance, & God is e centre of that balance. Many times we spend too much time in 1 area & topple e whole thing. God wants us 2 trust in Him & lead a balanced life. Sometimes we make family, e person we love, ministry, our activities our god w/o realizing it! It's hard sometimes 2 let go, but it has 2 be done, if not we'll juz topple our own lives & make a mess of it.

So into ur hands I trust Lord Jesus. All I am & have, I surrender 2 U. U r e centre of my life & I'll trust in U 2 live a balanced life. 2 do my best in everything, yet know when 2 let go. U will be e increase & U will be glorified in e process.

Into Your Hands, I Commit Again
With All I Am, For You Lord
You Hold My World, In The Palm Of Your Hand
& I Am Yours, Forever

Jesus I Believe, In You
Jesus I Belong, To You
You're The Reason I Believe
The Reason That I Sing, With All I Am

I'll Walk With You, Wherever You Go
Through Tears & Joy, I'll Trust In You
& I Will Live, In All Of Your Ways
& Your Promises, Forever

I Will Worship, I Will Worship You
I Will Worship, I Will Worship You